How I Was Transformed By The Left – Redefining Normal

I used to think I was just a regular guy, but . . .  I was born white, which now, whether I like it or not, makes me a racist; 

 

·         I am a fiscal and moral conservative, which by today’s standards, makes me a fascist; 

 

·         I am heterosexual, which according to gay folks, now makes me a homophobic; 

 

·         I am non-union, which makes me a traitor to the working class and an ally of big business; 

 

·         I am a Christian, which now labels me as an infidel; 

 

·         I believe in the 2nd Amendment, which now makes me a member of the vast gun lobby; 

 

·         I am older than 70, which makes me a useless old man; 

·         I think and I reason, therefore I doubt much that the main stream media tells me, which must make me a reactionary; 

 

·         I am proud of my heritage and our inclusive American culture, which makes me a xenophobe; 

 

·         I value my safety and that of my family and I appreciate the police and the legal system, which makes me a right-wing extremist; 

 

·         I believe in hard work, fair play, & fair compensation according to each individual’s merits, which today makes me an anti-socialist; 

 

·         I believe in the defense and protection of the homeland for and by all citizens, which now makes me a militant; 

*        Recently, a woman called me and my friends a “basket of deplorables”; 

 

·         Please help me come to terms with the new me…because I’m just not sure who I am anymore! 

*  I would like to thank all my friends for sticking with me through these abrupt, new found changes in my life and my thinking – I just can’t imagine or understand what’s happened to me so quickly.

 

*  Funny…it’s all just taken place over the last 7 or 8 years.  

 

And, as if all this crap wasn’t enough to deal with, I’m now afraid to go into either restroom….